Overwhelmed and sad

Today I am sad and overwhelmed. It has been a while in coming so I am not completley suprised. I am worried about my husband and his job situation, the nations gas problem has begun taking a toll on his workers (they work at night) and he has had to supplement with our home account. He is constantly looking for replacments and that itself causes him great stress. I worry about him and his health. We have reduced our children's summer program which causes me to worry, since they both love the program and I don't want them to be sitting in front of the idiot box all day, their daddy is so worn out that I don't see a whole lot he will feel like doing out in the hot Texas sun. I am trying to put together some "school work" packets that each kiddo can do with his help, so they do not backslide over the summer. I had already contacted a summer tutor and want to still have that in place. My oldest did not have a positive experience in 1st grade and I don't want her hating school. Between working outside of the home fulltime, swimming schedule(Ava), tutor schedule, dr appts and gym I want to cry. Maybe because all this extra stuff is new to me. I also tend to internalize things. I haven't been able to see my therapist cause I don't want to spend the money AND take time off of work OR spend the gas to get there:)I already regret taking the Memorial day long weekend off since that turned out to be total cluster. I hate working but I am the one with the health insurance which is a another concern, July starts our new plan year with all the deductables start over, more money out of pocket. Sigh. On top of that I went to my nieces graduation and saw some people I graduated with and their children are graduating and here I am with a 5 and 7 year old. I am ready to cry. I think I am doing things right and then it seems so ROYALY screwed up.